BET is on POINT!!!!

boy, how do i love BET? let me count the ways...they are really trying to make a comeback! i loves me some them. ok, lemme stop.....but i accidentally caught the series premiere of their new show College Hill: Interns. PRAISE THE LAWD AND PASS THE PEAS!!! i'm in love!

basically there is a group of ten college age folks who go to chicago to intern and be guided by dr. ian smith (celebrity fit club & 50-Million Pound Challenge).

so of course, last night was the intro episode where we got to meet this "interesting" group of chill'ens.

so this is marc. he just graduated from college and had a 4 year basketball scholarship. he's interested in all things sports and seems like he'll be the playboy of the group.

enter jenna. aw lawd! i TOTALLY know someone like her. she's cute and smart, graduated from college cum laude. has a boyfriend, yet openly flirts with marc once she sits down with him. but the biggest turnoff about her is her MOUTH! she so L-O-U-D!!! i hate that. the more she spoke, they more she revealed that she's the loud one who wants ALL of the attention, wants all the boys to be in love with her, all the girls to envy her, all people on general to be impressed with her and her "smarts" and she worked my nerve from start to finish!

then comes lonnie. he initially looks like he could play the human version of theodore from alvin and the chipmunks cuz his cheeks are like...

anyhoo, i forgot his stats, but of course, jenna was right at home in her marc and lonnie sandwich, cuz you know they both love her...BLEH!

enter tationna. she's from bx, baby! and instantly i got the vibe that she considered herslef to be kinda princess-ish. you ever met someone who thought they were a fashionista, but their stuff SCREAMED bargain basement? well, there you have it.

help me lawd, and hold my mule! here's spencer. a preacher's kid from north ca'lina. (that's how some of them say it for real!) anyhoo, this brotha walked in wearing a blue suit. well you ask, what's wrong with that? well, it wasn't navy blue, wasn't black-blue...it was ROYAL BLUE, PIMP DADDY BLUE, JHERI CURL PREACHER BLUE, M&M CANDY BLUE!! ARRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!! my eyes bled from the sight. this dude is country, i mean, CUNTRY, CUNTREY! of course, the others took note of the faux pas and were utterly confused by it. but because i lived in the south for a while, i understand that some southerners have a different "style" about them. colors and patterns are their friends. and not regular colors and patterns, but really LOUD and offensive ones. kinda like.....

except he didn't have the hat. vomit stage left<<<<<<<<<

here's kathy. initially, i loved her style and her hair, until i saw her b-boy designs cut into her hair style. that totally ruined it for me. it just doesn't look professional. i mean, it was like, on some kanye west ziggy-zag tip. but her outfit was still banging. oh, and yes, she loves "p**sy." YES FOLKS, she's a lesbian and she wears too much make up so when the camera is close on her face, she looks like a BRATZ doll.

kasheef...what can i say? he's like a drunken michael bivins. he kinda looks like him, and his vioce...OMG! sounds just like him, except he speaks very slow and slurry, like he's drunk.* he's short like him too!

ivy is like the mama of the group. she's very subdued, pretty quiet and like the shrinking violet. i can see that she'll prolly be the hard worker who will end up doing extra for the slackers in the house.

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so after everyone introduced themselves, they moved into the house which was quite lovely. they had a team building challange and relay race with everyone divided into two teams. the winning team won gift cards andthe only funny part was that tationna was on the losing team and she kept whining about how she actually broke a "sweat" and didn't even win anything. LOL!

so later on, everyone decided to go out bowling and to the club. let the bootay hunching begin. I SO HATE THAT CRAP! whatever happened to real dancing. women, grinding your bootay into a man's ween-doggy dog does not a dance make! men, trying to drill your member into the back of a young lady's skirt is not hot...UGH! anyhoo, everyone enjoyed themselves and the love fest ensued.

well, all shows start like that. (remember the last college hill? HA!) the drama shall begin shortly and a small tidbit began when all of the dudes decided to go out without the ladies and get their "stunna" on. of course with those cameras on, the hoochies were lined up and these guys were poppin bttles and everything. *enter kasheef! someone was waaaaaaaaay too happy to be on tv and have some free champagne cuz he guzzled down a whole bottle by himself and was drunk out of his mind. the other guys had to literally carry him into the house. that's so sexy! and there he lay, near the procelain throne all night....and everyone has a meeting with dr. ian the next morning.....................

we'll see how things pan out next week. i'm sure B(ootay) E(ntertainment) T(elevision) will re-run it a zillion times, so check it out!

OH! i almost forgot about these two.......

maurice...he's the cutie of the house if you ask me. but he has a lot of tattoos on his arms and i just wish these kids would stop tatting themselves up all over the place. i mean, to the degree that wearing a simple polo shirt will reveal your name, your whole family tree and whatever else you chose to have doodled all up and down your person. think about the career you even desire to have one day. image is everything peoples!

this is letia. she literally bounces out of the car and into the room wearing a tank top and mini jean skirt. she's the one who's currently "in love" and has ginormous watermelon boobs. how inappropriate did she look going into a professional meeting room with excess boobage spilling onto the table? can we say..LOTS!?! hey, but she does wish they were smaller...way to downplay your melons, lay them on your resume when meeting dr. ian while wearing spaghetti straps!

LOVE THIS HOT MESS OF A SHOW!!! WHOOPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Computer Wackosity

ok, so i'm like TRYING to post and my internet connection is on some serious BLEH! i'm literally borrowing someone else's computer just to type this, but hopefully i'll be back up and running cuz i have some stuff just a'brewin' in this ignant little mind....it's itching to get out!

YOWZA!

The Salt-N-Pepa Show: "Lawd, Where's my Scalpel?"

i just have to say that i have just sampled my newest crack...THE SALT-N-PEPA SHOW. fly me to the moon!

let's get straight to it...salt has moved on, grown up and has her lovely christian family and life tucked away in a very warm and fuzzy little home on long island. pepa is still loud, boisterous, chasing a dream & trying to make a dollar outta fifteen cents. i love them BOTH! well, shaq is throwing some party and requests to have them perform and they met up to discuss the possibility. it went something like this...

SALT: i dunno, i'm over this

PEPA: well, i want to. you left me hanging years ago. YOU SUCK DONKEY BALLS!

SALT: i just wanna do what i wanna do, not what you wanna do or anybody else wants to do, just me and what i wanna do-DO-DOOOOOOOO!

PEPA: you owe me cuz you ruined erry'thang!

SALT: boo-hoo-hoo, i was all barfy, sticking my finger down my throat, like depressed and stuff and i was going insane in my membrane ('member that song, hee hee!)

PEPA: get over it, please! i'll wash your car, i'll be your best friend, i'll braid your hair, i'll buy you a new nose like the one i'm gonna get

SALT: ok, lemme think (mumbles: i hate you)

PEPA: (mumbles, i hate you more!)

so pepa goes out with her (rowdy) friend circle and totally trashes salt and her moral outlook. meanwhile salt is lighting candles, humming and crying to her sister circle about the decision she's facing. well, sister circle encouraged her to do it in a positive way so she called pep and the convo went kinda like this........

SALT: boo-hoo-boo, ok so i was thinking...

PEPA: uh-huh

SALT: and i think i can push it real good, i mean, i can do it for the lawd

PEPA: betta had, b*tch! SIKE, nah, but for real, you betta had...PEACE!!!

SALT: WAIT!!! i'm uncomfortable so can you go easy with me?

PEPA: um yeah, i'll try to make you more comfortable. you can cry on my shoulder...i'll hold your hand...i'll be the wind beneath your wings

SALT: um, are you speaking lesbian to me? i told you, i'm not down AND STOP DREAMING ABOUT STICKING YOUR FINGER IN MY CLEAVAGE!!

PEPA: you wish! (thinking...dang! i sure was)

so they met up to discuss some of the details about the upcoming performance like salt's need to change some lines. pep agrees and off to rehearsal they go! i almost dropped my coke bowl when i saw pepa giving an onlooker faux-fellatio as she rapped "whatta man." THAT MESS WAS HILARIOUS!! of course, salt had to pull her aside and check her. but pepa's excuse was the funniest part. she was like "i'm not in his crotch! i start at his KNEE, then i work my way up (to his crotch)." LOL

salt prolly tossed and turned all night cuz she met pepa in the park to re-discuss the previous incident. what cracked me up was how salt was just over talking and basically screaming on pepa. then pepa sat there like a lil' kid who just agreed with everything. nonetheless, shaq cancelled so salt suggested they rap at her church..."WHOOPEE!" was pepa's reply (ok, not really, but still)

showtime! pepa shows up at the church with my personal fave, see thru nipple bearing shirts and hooker boots. salt, OF COURSE, checked her again and they went on the perform "whatta man-the gospel version." but pepa had to be pepa, she carressed her body and tried to dip it to the floor/drop it like it's hot for jesus, but salt's all-seeing eye caught it and snatch her bootay right up! LOL afterward, they kissed and hugged backstage and the ep ended with salt apologizing for walking out on pep the way she did back in the day.

all in all, i love this show! it's gonna be jam-packed with hilarity and foolishness. what i noticed was salt is very strong mouthed! she will scream on you in a second, almost like you're her kid. and pepa can be all loud and crazy, but is easily punked. i love how they play the different music for the two...like when salt is on, her background music is all peaceful and mild. and when pepa is on, hers is like a thunderclap, just vicious and rough. the editors are making this show look a hot, hateful mess and i LOVES IT!!!

but WHAT I REALLY WANT TO KNOW IS WHO THE UNLICENSED HECK JACKED UP PEPA'S NOSE?!?!?! and what was so funny was when the show was airing...they kept showing her with the new nose during promos and commercials but she has the old nose on the show. it was spooky....if i could, i'd pay for her to RE-chop that thang cuz it's not working for me. what's wrong with it? i can't quite put my finger on it but something just ain't right. oh, i think it's the nostrils. they look like she's struggling to breathe. they're waaaaaaaaaay too small. lawd, give her air!

cuz, um...she's rick james, b*tch!

tune in folks!

Adrienne Curry: A Hot White, Jew Marry-er

WHOA! i absolutely LOVE when people talk out of their *sses...take a gander

“MY Boycott against BET and Black History Month
Because of my last blog, and all the wonderful feedback I got..it made me think…
This is gonna be hard guys. I LOVE the comedians on BET. I also LOVE the fact that they play my favorite show of all time, In Living Color. However, I do not believe in seperating ANY RACE in America. WE ARE AMERICANS! How dare we have Black History Month! In my eyes, the Native Americans deserve it MUCH more, seeing how we destroyed their ENTIRE SOCIETY. There are hardly any of them left! They also have been proven to have the WORST living conditions on their reservations. I want AN AMERICAN HISTORY MONTH. One where we learn about EVERY race, ALL OF OUR LEADERS, EVERYONE! I think by having a month dedicated to one race, and not one for any other, is RACIST. Every fund set up to only help people of one race is SICK and RACIST.

Yes, I get it. Black people were slaves here once. You know what? That does suck some major balls, however, it is time to move the fuck on. Do we hear the Jews crying that they were made slaves for thousands of years? Do we hear them whine that they should OWN the pyramids in Egypt because THEY broke their backs making them? Do we hear them bitch and moan about Hitler, etc? (my hubby is a Jew)Nope, we dont. It’s time for us to UNITE AS ONE. I do not think that singling out one race, giving one race opportunities to go to college (I know a TON of poor white.asian, indian, american indian, etc etc that could use that too!), giving one race the EXCUSE to blame things on others for being whatever nationality they are, is a good way at making sure we NEVER kill racism.

I am over this shit. WE ALL CAME FROM ONE BLACK WOMAN FROM AFRICA, THAT is our EVE! It has been proven by science, and I stand by it. If any other race had a chanel dedicated to just them, we would think it was racist. If any other race demanded a month be set aside for ONLY them, they would be considered racist. I am NOT living by this double standard any longer.
Think I am racist? I am not. I know what racism is. I dated a guy named “Justin” in Junior high. Nothing serious, but I really liked him. He was the blackest of black…BEAUTIFUL skin, kinda like Alex Wek’s. He was handsome, and athletic, etc. I was called a nigger lover. But you know what? I was called that by a whole 2 people out of a school with HUNDREDS of students. THAT is why I am NOT buying this racist shit anymore. Let us teach or children that there is NO DIFFERENCE! We are all human. I hope one day aliens land and try to kill us. Maybe THEN we would finally realize that WE are ONE.

So, I will no longer tune into BET. This is going to suck, but I do NOT like the idea of having a chanel for only 1 race. In the year 2007 in a country that is supposed to be the most advanced and equal. This is unexceptable! I will also no longer acknowledge Black History Month. Instead, I will see it the way that Morgan Freeman does (I have the quote at the bottom of my last blog on Obama/jesseJackson, and OJ). AMERICAN HISTORY MONTH! I will read/watch/and learn about ALL the people who made a difference in this country.

I am asking you ALL to join me. Black, White, Indian, Asian, Russian, Australian, etc etc…..lets be AMERICANS together! What happened to the African American community was AMERICAN HISTORY, not BLACK HISTORY. If you want to celebrate in a way that excludes others and singles one race out, count me the FUCK out! I am soooo proud to be an American. I am SO proud that I have friends of every race, and none of us see each other as anything but what we are..people. Lets change Black History Month to 2 months of AMERICAN HISTORY. We will still learn about all the black leaders and people who made a difference….just not with the racist name of “Black History Month”. It has to start somewhere. I am going to do my part in making sure we are all treated EQUAL in a country that CLAIMS we are. NO MORE SPECIAL TREATMENT FOR ANYONE WITH ANYTHING!

It will never happen. At least, that is what many of you will say…FINE! My number one priority here is being able to die and know that I stood up for what I believed in, and that I did not add to the SEPERATION OF AMERICANS!! I love my country, I love the people in it. I love our history, good and bad. We should LEARN from it,not dwell in it and not move forward. That’s why I am done with this shit. You are all my brothers and sisters…..even if I think you suck ; ) As Bono said, “One life, with each other..sisters…brothers!”

now, have fun burning me at the stake ; )”

PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE...DISCUSS!

that's right, adrienne...keep enriching us racist americans with visions of your flat *ss. it makes everything you say THAT much more credible and sensible....